Yes and many others do not “get over it”. What about them? How can their sacrifice be justified? For those who do come out of it? For others who don’t go through difficult things and maybe are even happy? Is it morally justified to cause suffering to a certain group, regardless of its size or proportion in relation to the general group, so that another group, even if much larger, will enjoy life overall? And is it not a moral crime to decide that it is morally justified, especially in light of the fact that none of those who will enjoy life will be harmed in any way or will lack any of the experiences they would have had, if they are never created?
Would you say the same about someone in a job that makes them miserable? Or someone in an abusive relationship? Not a chance. You would suggest that these people should get out of these situations they got into because there is no reason for them to suffer even if they can “get out of it”. The same goes for reproduction only that in the case of reproduction as opposed to a workplace or a relationship, the created people didn’t even choose to be created.
Anti-natalism is not a denial that it is possible for people who go through difficult things in life to ‘come out of it’ and even feel that their lives are worthy, but a denial of the justification of this possibility. Since no one needed, wanted, hoped, or expected to be created, or would have been harmed if s/he had not been created, everyone who suffers in life, suffers unjustifiably.
Anti-natalism doesn’t doubt people’s feeling that they are capable of living hard lives, anti-natalism doubts forcing hard lives on people. Why would someone be put in a place where they have to go through hard things when the alternative is that they will never exist and therefore not have to deal with anything hard, or want to deal with anything hard, or want to experience good things, but simply that there would never be that person?
The fact that people go through difficult lives is not a justification for creating people, but a reason not to create them, because the alternative does not subtract or prevent them from anything, while a difficult life causes them to suffer a difficult life.
It is necessary to overcome difficulties only because and as long as people impose on other people situations in which they are forced to overcome difficulties, but there is no need for this in itself. No one needs to exist, no one asked to exist, it was not in anyone’s interest to exist before their existence was forced upon them, but it was always someone else’s decision and never in order to overcome necessary difficulties. Difficulties are not necessary, but a product of the fact that there are those who live in a world full of problems and flaws and some of them constitute difficulties. They are not there in themselves, nor are they necessary in themselves.
This argument indicates that it is possible to go through life even if it is difficult, not that it is necessary, worthwhile, desirable, or that it is in someone’s interest to go through such a life. No one would ask for such a life if they could before living it, but rather people were thrown into such a life and have no alternatives so they are living these lives. They are afraid to die, afraid to hurt others, curious to see what will happen to them, convinced that things will get better, etc., but the question is not whether it is possible to live a worthy life despite great difficulties, but why throw someone into such a life in the first place?
Why would someone struggle to go through difficulties that are not necessary in the first place and exist only because s/he exists?
And this is always true and relevant, not only in the case of difficult lives. In the case of a difficult life it is simply at a higher volume, but it is always the case that everything that people go through is not necessary. It is always true that suffering is endured for no reason since no one needed to exist, sought to exist, wanted to exist, preferred to exist, or anything related to any preference, interest or desire, before anyone existed. People are always forced to live with no reason that could be justified by them. In the case of those who live a difficult life it is simply more terrible.
The fact that people cling to life even if they are miserable is not a justification to continue it but the opposite. The biological attraction of life is a reason to avoid it because it actually traps people in miserable lives as they are built to stick to it. But there is no external rational reason for this, only an internal biological one. It is like this for no particular reason other than that this is how people are built. It’s a cruel trap. It’s a testament to how addictive and dangerous life is, not a testament to how justified it is despite being dangerous.
Not only do not all ‘get out of it’, even among those who supposedly succeed, it always leaves scars, scars that can be huge or small, but never really heal. And even if they do, why put people through difficult experiences that can be prevented from them without harming them in any way?
Reproduction is an unnecessary creation of an unnecessary and vulnerable person who will inevitably experience unnecessary harms.
No one should have to go through anything in life. No one wants to go through things in life before it has started. Why put people in a situation where they will have to go through difficult things in life when it is not necessary in any way, and when they did not choose it, or their very existence, or anything about their existence? The ability to go through difficult things is not a justification for putting someone in a situation where s/he may encounter difficult things when it is completely unnecessary or requested in advance by that someone. To force a situation where going through difficult things is a completely realistic option is simply cruel.